Your daughter has started her period. Now, in the same place where the little girl with bows in her hair stood – is a pseudo woman. It can be bittersweet to realize just how fast your daughter is growing up. As a parent, it is extremely important to welcome the changes and to help your daughter transition into womanhood feeling accepted and loved.
It is also important to try and take a step back and realize what your daughter may be feeling. For so many girls, the onset of menstruation comes seemingly too early in life. Suddenly, they are dealing with extremely ‘adult’ things such as picking out bras and handling periods during a time in their life when they were perfectly comfortable dressing up Barbies and playing outside. In your daughter’s mind, the start of her periods alerts her to the fact that she is in fact growing up. And this realization can be both welcome and frightening for a young girl.
A lot of parents notice that menstruation brings many changes in their daughter’s demeanor. Some girls react to the news that they started their period with glee and excitement, hardly being able to contain the fact that they finally get to wear a bra. Other girls may react quite the opposite and feel embarrassed or ashamed by all the physical changes – and stressed by the sudden ‘push’ into adulthood.
You may notice that your daughter might be quicker to anger. She may become resentful, or even show signs of depression at the onset of her menstrual cycles. This is only due to the fact that she feels conflicted about whether or not she is still a little girl – or a woman. Many kids, do not want to grow up and see the start of something like a period as a gateway into adulthood. They may feel forced to give up childish things like Barbies or toys, or fear that their parents won’t love them same now that they are ‘growing up.’ It is also perfectly normal for parents to see some regression from their daughters. For instance, your daughter may suddenly want to sit on your lap or be treated with the kid gloves that parents routinely use for toddlers.
How your daughter reacts to her period largely depends on her personality. It also has a lot to do with how well (or poorly) her loved ones usher her through this gateway. Your daughter likely wants to remain a child for as long as she possibly can. Remember that just because she is menstruating, doesn’t mean that she is all grown up. Your best bet as a parent is to allow her to take the lead and then follow. Compassionately.
It’s a good idea to remind your daughter that she will always be your little girl, no matter how big – or how many periods she has. While she may not understand exactly how you feel – it will certainly help her transition through these years and embrace growing up more effectively.
Change, no matter how old you are, can be difficult. For your daughter, experiencing so many changes at once can be difficult. Remember, she is still just a child.
This is such a great article and so helpful to parents. Throughout our kids’ lives it can be hard to remember how really little they still are even as they seem so mature. Helpful notes about what to expect here too. Nicely done.
Visiting from the vB Hodgepodge event. Have a great day, Tara! 🙂
Thanks for visiting and for the kind words!
Great article and counting my lucky shamrocks because I have boys.
Pam
Thanks for visiting Pam!
This day is quickly approaching here. Should girls wear tampons or stick with just pads? That’s my question.
Thanks for visiting us Jill! How old is your daughter? What a girl “should” wear really depends on what she is comfortable with. Many girls just starting their periods are not comfortable enough with their bodies to use tampons. Starting with an externally worn product (pads) before trying internal products is easiest. Because a girl’s cycle/flow can be irregular for the first 2 years picking the proper tampon (for absorbency) can be difficult. For girls that do choose to wear tampons we highly suggest choosing a 100% cotton tampon. TSS is a very real danger (especially for younger girls). Studies show that viscose rayon (found in traditional products) is now solely responsible for tampon related TSS. We welcome you to check out our Info on Periods & Puberty page, we are constantly posting new articles to help parents on this topic. We are also hosting a Tweet Chat for parents on March 9th, would love to have you join us! Please feel free to contact us anytime if you have any other questions. We are always happy to help!
Thank Goodness I have boys. Although I have to kindly explain why the girls get to to go the restroom when ever they want but the boys have to wait until recess. LOL
Funny you should mention that, we actually have a post that will be going up soon written from a male’s perspective. He mentions his experience growing up realizing the differences in the boy bathrooms vs. girl bathrooms including the question “what was the nature and purpose of that large white box bolted to the side of the bathroom wall?” 🙂 Stay tuned…
You are a wealth of information! I’m not sure who is going to have the bigger problem with my daughter getting her period: me or her! Even though I have a 4 year old daughter too, my 10 year old is growing up way too quickly. I know her day is just around the corner … I hope to come to the place where I can support her and understand her when it actually does happen.
Have a great day!
Kristie-
I have a feeling you will do great when the time comes! If ever you need help, just let us know. 🙂
Thanks for sharing this article – definitely some things to keep in mind for the future!
Kristina
Thanks for visiting Kristina!
Such an awesome article and so informative too. I dread the day my daughter(s) start their period. I’m not ready for them to get there yet. Even though I know they will still be my little girls, there is still something “grown up” about menstruation.
Thank you Rosann! I understand how you feel, they grow up way too fast!