I have to start by saying that my mom and I are now best of friends and this is in no way criticism of the way she raised me it was a different time and talking about certain things were still taboo.
When I was a young girl there was no “talk” about your cycle or what to expect, actually I don’t think there was much talking about anything regarding our bodies.  I do remember my very forward-thinking mom buying me “Are You There God? It’s Me Margaret.”  But that was probably the only real “discussion” we had.
When my period came the only real information I had was the vague information from “health” class (in those days it was less information more ewww it’s yucky) and from my peers as well as the outdated information in the book from mom.
I was 11 or 12 when “aunt flo” came to visit the first time,  I know it was a bit scary and I was surprised when cramps and clots happened.  No one mentioned these exciting and fantastic things I got to discover on my own.
The usage of tampons and pads were awkward and I spent many days scrubbing stains that I wasn’t prepared for.  I knew that mom had a bucket under the sink for her icky things so I took her signal as this was the way it was SUPPOSED to be.
The whole period thing was disgusting, horrible and uncomfortable as I have fibroid cysts on my ovaries (making my cramps insufferable).

The older I got the more I knew that if i were to have a daughter I would talk to her about what to expect from her period.  She was 6 when I was pregnant with her brother and I knew it was time to start talking. Everything from body dysmorphic disorder to menstruation was open to discussion. I used every method of talking to her from lunch dates with her just to talk about something she asked about to using my OBGYN for open straightforward factual discussions.  If anything she was over informed 🙂 she knew about cramps clots and stains, she practiced with pads and we discussed tampons.
When she was 9 or 10 I finally found the DIVA cup.  It was my ahhh haaa moment, the one where the light-bulb comes on in your mind and you find that periods don’t have to be horrid ungodly experiences.   The cramps lessened, my whole outlook on menstruation changed, it stopped being the scary gross time of the month and started being closer to normal.
My talks with my daughter changed as my outlook changed, less doom and gloom more sunshine on my shoulder.
When she started her period there were no surprises, she was comfortable with what was happening, she is still using pads and tampons but she KNOWS the options and I am trying to talk her into a cup of her own.  But for her (at 13) there is still the yuck factor and she doesn’t want to be different from her friends.  She makes less mess since she is more informed and she knows that if she has any questions she can come to me.
A far cry from a while ago when I was trying to figure all this out pretty much on my own. I hope that you can talk to your daughter while she is young too,  honestly and openly,  remember your daughter will one day be a woman with a period too.

By Heather Lynne